Hormones are no joke!

So, before I dive into hormones, etc., I just want to say this....

LADIES...YOU ROCK!

okay, now back to the originally scheduled post...

So, my husband and I are on the baby journey and while it's not exactly what we imagined, I think it fits us just perfectly. I'm on day 3 of injections getting ready for IVF and while for the most part it hasn't been bad, there are so definite side effects/symptoms/whatever from the hormones. First things first, let's talk about hot flashes. So you know how right around that time of the month you feel a bit hotter? Like body temperature is up and there NEVER seems to be enough air flow to cool you down? Well, imagine that happening when you're walking downhill in 60 degree weather (with a breeze!) with a tank top and jean jacket on. Oh and did I mention this is like the LEAST STRENUOUS PACE EVER? Yeah, so walking downhill and wanting to strip off all my clothes is pretty much where I'm at. Plus the random hot flashes at night when I'm trying to fall asleep and just in the middle of the night (i.e. beads of sweat on my back...ewwww!). It's bizarre, weird and reminds me that our bodies are pretty damn powerful and smart. Next! Let's see. I guess I could mention the bloating. So the shots I'm doing currently go right in the tummy. And while I've never been a skinny-ninny, if you ever wanted to feel what it's like to have a tire around your waist, the shots are the way to go. The strange thing is that for me, you don't really see it...I just feel it. It feels like I took some cotton and stuffed myself around the waist and yet when looking at myself, I still look the same (time will tell on that one though!). Other symptoms? Hmmmmm, insomnia. Now this one's tricky because I don't know if it's more of a mental thing or a medicine thing, but given that it really just started happening, I'm gonna lump it into a symptom. Others? I'm sure there are. I've noticed a slight headache everyday since I've started and while that could be a symptom, it also could be because I started cutting back on my caffeine intake...who knows! Otherwise though, I feel pretty good. And when the outcome of all of this is *fingers crossed* a happy, healthy baby, I seriously get SO EXCITED. Maybe it's all the hormones or maybe it's just because it's all finally happening, but nothing makes me more emotional nor excited than the thought of holding a little one in my arms. Oh, and pretty much the sight of any woman gets me all choked up. Like, I dunno what happened today when I was walking home, but all I could think about was how every single woman should be walking around high-fiving each other and being like, "WE GOT THIS!" I mean, WE GROW HUMANS INSIDE OF US...does it get any more powerful than that??????? And while I'm on the subject, I just gotta say this. If you ever find yourself in a fertility clinic, give those ladies there an extra big smile. Like, we all know why were there and while everyone's fertility story is different, I really don't know of any people who need a smile more. I think I might just start hugging them all, no?! haha, who knows. Anyway, that's a lil' update on where were at, how things are going and things I'm feeling. Stay tuned for more updates! much love..muah! 

Time flies, no?!

Hello, hello! So it's been, what, 4 years since I've posted here? Holy h*ll. Errrrr, time flies, no?! So let's see...where to begin? Well...4 years ago I moved to Colombia and 3 years ago I met an amazing man. We're now married, I became a stepmom and we're about to embark on our own parenthood adventure, too. It's awesome, scary, fun and crazy all at the same time! What else? Let's see. In June, I walked away from my job and while it was definitely the right decision, it also hasn't been quite as easy as I thought it might be. A friend recently told me that it probably felt a lot like a breakup and although I hadn't thought of it like that, they were 100% right. Walking away and re-establishing myself has come with all those familiar emotions of a breakup and while annoying and hard, I know I'm better because of it. Just in the last week or so, I feel like a fog has been lifted (plus I'm finally not sick...hooray!) and while I'm not exactly jumping out of bed in the morning (let's be real, waking up at 5am for the last 4 years ssssssssucked...let me have my mornings for a lil' bit, k?), I don't exactly feel like sobbing for no reason and/or curling up in bed all day anymore. Now don't get me wrong, I still like a good cry and I definitely am enjoying my time and if that means being in bed all day, so be it! But...I don't have that hole anymore. You know that hole? Ugh, that hole blowssssssssss. Buttttttt, like all wounds/holes/scrapes/bruises, a little time, a little love and a whole lotta chocolate makes 'em fade before your eyes. It's kind of amazing how that all works and while my 19-year-old self NEVER would have believed that (ugh, that first heartbreak is the worst, no?), it's totally true. So anyway...here I am. 31, unemployed (self-employed?), trying for a baby and while not grieving anymore, I'm also not sure that I'm totally clear on where I want to go or be. I've been reading a lot and have some ideas on jobs/companies I want to do, but as I sit in our apartment in Bogota, I find it hard to get motivated to make them happen. People keep telling me to pursue these ideas and do all the grunt work here while I have the time, but it's hard to do all of that when I have no idea where to begin. Logo? Slogan? Business plan? Legal stuff? Bleh! I dunno. But I do know that writing/journaling helps me get things flowing so while I may not know where I'm going, I'm going and that's what's important to me.

And, before I forget...

Here are some pics from the Jesuit Ruins that I went to here in Paraguay a few weeks ago. It was a great little getaway! :)

View from the hotel


Ruins














So glad I ventured out to Encarnacion to see these ruins. My last few months in Paraguay are upon me...yikes! Hope I get to see more of the 'guay here soon! much love to everyone! xoxo, m

Bolivia or Bust, Baby!!! Whoop, whoop! :)

So, I just got back from Bolivia a couple of days ago and man, was that an adventure!!! Not only did we bust a move all over the country, but we also have about a gazillion stories to share. Oh yeah, and I came back a year older!!! Weeeeeeeee! Yay birthdays! Anyway, here's my list of memories and some pictures to share...enjoy!!! ~m

Bolivia = leaving straight-away from school, gross smelling plane ride to Santa Cruz, visa paperwork, landing in la Paz, Ceci with no luggage, meeting Ceci's aunt Sonia at airport, crazy taxi ride, fires on the side of the street, hotel espana, our tour guide- Ceci's cousin Anita, checking out Ceci's family's apartment, view of light covered hill, pressing my nose against the glass to see the mountain with snow, absent, cocoa leaf candies for altitude sickness, cab ride with 5 to old haunted downtown, packed dive bars/restaurants, pizza de la piedra, what sound does a zebra make?, but she's a hippy too!, yeah but she's like a fancy hippy, 1am sleep time, 5 am wakeup call, severe altitude headache, bus to Copacabana, totally zonking out, Chaya's bus incident ;), Chris - I could have lived without that information, me - impressed, beautiful scenery, green green grass, huge lake, mountains, paper dolls hanging from the bus ceiling up front, I'm in [dirty] leggings right now-i win, bus on ferry across the lake, Emily left her bag, chest hurting from altitude?, gas, cocoa leaf tea, big breakfast, shopping for goods, lolly the llama purchase, priests spraying down cars with flowers all over them, 30 minute/1.5hour boat ride, fuzzy fruit, 2 hour hike to hotel, amazing views, crazy chicken with feathers on feet, cocoa leaf tea and crackers and chocolate cookies, liquor de coca, sheep herds while watching reverse sunset, donkey happiness?, delicious dinner, sick roommate, 6am hike down the mountain island to watch the sunrise, hour boatride to pre-incan ruins, labyrinth, lady with sheep by the ruins, boat transfer in the middle of lake titicaca, hour long boat ride with old men gambling up front, ladies weaving next to us, man eating coca leaves next to me, arrival at copacabana and eating at Mexican restaurant, more shopping-legwarmers, socks, gloves, hat; bus ride back to la Paz-all 5 of us in the back seat, Emily and I playing the word association game for 2.5 hours, sitting on the floor of the bus, showers and unpacking/repacking at aunt sonia's house, disappointment at the bus terminal, no reservations, back to sonia's, getting news that we have a private mini-bus, sleeping in the back of the mini-bus, 3 flat tires, 5 hours on the side of the road, stranded pictures, braiding chaya's hair, hippie awesomeness, broken sunglasses, birds eating poo, rescue by Edgar with lunch for all, not abandoning Ismael, coolest couple ever, quinoa fields, drive to the salt flats, crazy fun salt flats photos, Lolly the llama photos, water over the salt, walking barefoot on the salt, salt mounds, beautiful reflection photos, clothes covered in salt, chillin in uyuni, drive to first night's hotel, 3 person shower with hot water, super colorful bedding, 6am wakeup, drive to Arbol de piedra, laguna roja, flamingos, aguas termales, laguna blanca, laguna verde, awesome colors, hospedeja at laguna blanca, super duper super cold night, awesome birthday surprises, maxi pad absorption note, rock structure, sweet notes to bring in my 27th year:), cold cold night, ridiculously awesome stars, sleeping in til 7:30, lots of driving, valley of the rocks, train cemetery, candy and glitter stars purchased at San cristobal, rock church, all the girls wearing the stars, candy spray, jelly filled marshmallows, pringles, pringles, and more pringles, hanging out in uyuni before our 10 hour bus ride back to la Paz, sleeping on the bus, early morning arrival to la Paz, staying at ceci's grandparents' house, touring la Paz, Thai food, coca museum, Internet cafe with 30+ guys playing video games, 123 emails with awesome birthday messages, coffee and lemon pie, resting at the g'rents house, mango's for our last dinner in la paz, groovy music, awesome g&ts, flight to Santa Cruz, afternoon with Ceci's Uncle's family, riding in the back of his truck, even more flight delays, vino at the airport, finishing grading on the plane ride back...yes!

Church at Copacabana


Boat ride to Isla del Sol


Arriving at Isla del Sol


Hiking up to our hotel while enjoying the view of Lake Titicaca!


Great scenery!


More great views!


We made it!


Sunset reflections


Hello, Sunrise :)


Pre-Incan Ruins


Flat tire adventures on our way to the Salt Flats!


Chilling in the Bolivian desert with awesome cloud configurations all day!


After 5 hours on the side of the road...we made it!!!


Look how high we can jump!!! ;) ;)


Rock sculptures


Beautiful scenery


More rock sculptures...this one's a tree!


Laguna Colorada


Geysers!


Laguna Verde


Laguna Blanca -- our home for the night...brrrrrr!


Valley of the Rocks








Our ride...holla!!!


Train Cemetery...






Coca museum during the last day in La Paz


Walking the streets in La Paz


And, viola! That's Bolivia in one week from a traveling teacher's point of view. Hope you enjoyed!!! xoxo, m

Epic Adventure 2.0

I realize I'm about 4.5 months late in posting this, but hey, better late than never!!! ;)

Over my big break this year, my parents came for a couple of weeks (see last post), I then rested in Asuncion for a couple of weeks, and then it was off to Colombia and Ecuador to explore, explore, explore! I didn't really start taking notes until we got to Quito, Ecuador, but will try and go back and fill in the gaps as I remember it! Enjoy!!! xo, m

Bogota = touring my new school (CNG), penthouse apartment with Eric and Lisa and the fam!, exploring my new stomping grounds, touring various apartments, cyclovia, excitement building for moving to a new city!!!

CNG -- my new school come July




Cyclovia -- an entire main avenue is shut down every Sunday so people can walk, bike, and explore the city! love it!!


Chocolate Santaferena -- yep, that's hot chocolate with cheese!!! que extrano!


La Candelaria neighborhood in Bogota -- the green people watch over the "city"


Cartagena = HOT, HOT, HOT!, massages on the beach, cute and super colorful old-town, flowers poking out through barricaded windows, carriage rides!, Playa Blanca, sleeping in hammocks on the beach, breath-taking sunset, candle pictures, crazy couples and lady that looked like a rooster?, super sketchy boat-ride back to Cartagena, clothes drying on the patio, spooky light fixture in the second hotel, yummy yummy thai fusion restaurant!, multiple textured purse that I envision using with all white and flowers poking out ;), another carriage ride, sunset at the corner bar/restaurant in my new dress, MUD VOLCANO!!!

Walking to the beach on Day 1


Playa Blanca!


So relaxing...:)


Sunset at Playa Blanca


On the city tour of Cartagena


At the fort...


Loved this Hostel (even though I didn't even stay there!)...if you go, stay there!!!


On our way to the...


Mud Volcano!!!!


Views from the carriage ride around town...








Us!


Sunset at Cafe del Mar


Quito = otavalo market and buying too much, Caitlin and Alex, zao restaurant, Mexican food, happy gringo travel agency, churches, beautiful view from their apt, almost losing my scarf

Touring Quito






Climbing up the bell tower!


Day-trip to Otavalo -- did a lot of damage here!! ;) ;)


Lunch??? ;) ;)


Chillin' in the city center park :)


Music at our actual lunch spot...loved it!


Banos = lovely hostel/b&b (la casa verde), Rebecca and Doug and baby John, rio verde, family of five room, walk to see volcano, falling and scraping knee, spiritual journey walk, banos de cajon (steam boxes), candle ear wax treatment, early evening in, organic breakfast, garden, last minute day trip of biking and rafting, craziest bus ride ever around mountain ridge with no guard rail, massages and colonics, thermal baths...love!, the good bar with Chris, Karen from London, bill from Canada and their three hours of happy hour, early 90s rap, karoake at la abuela, Karen getting very sick, ditching out and Chris and I barhopping more, Russian tourists dancing, one last bar and salsa dancing, walking home with a Jamaican, sleeping on the top bunk, walking around town, crazy earrings that look like hubcaps of a car, Chelsea handler book on bus and feeling nauseous, man selling videos of math and physics on bus, crazy turns on bus back to Quito

Driving into Banos


Walking around town... :)


Walking into THE spa! Lots of stories from here!!!


The gals on our spiritual journey! ;)


Approaching the end of the spiritual journey


Beautiful!


Bike tour before rafting!!!


Thermal Springs!!!


Church in Banos


Galapagos = MS Encantada, first day at Darwin station, sea turtle project, different kinds of sand, getting totally soaked with no umbrella or anything!, hanging around Santa Cruz, scared about the size of the boat, Andrew, Joan, Matt, mark, Maria, ralf, karoake on the mainland, captain belting out the ballads, $75 Bacardi bottles, rain, Emily and I skipping in the rain, first night on the boat, waking up to go cave swimming and "mail" postcards, snorkeling at devils crown, sharks, Emily with no flippers, hiking on day three on volcanic rock to see birds, hawks, marine iguanas, blow hole, blue footed bobbies, hike on another part of the island to see one lone flamingo and a beautiful beach, hermit crabs, sea lions under cool tree, disco dance music on the back of the boat, prostitute, fights, and art convos, sitting at the front of the boat and watching a white bird cruise along with us, stars at night, early wake up to lobos island to see baby sea lions and boobies and frigates, breakfast on board, sitting on top of the boat typing this, snorkeling another time with an eagle Ray, sharks, countless fish, bright blue tiny fish, 7 ft shark, sea lions, jumping off the roof of the boat, tanning on top of the boat, cactus forest, iguana molting, cutest sea lion pup with half sandy face, mom coming after us, dolphins swimming along side the boat on the last night, last morning walk, managing to pack every last thing!

Landing in the Galapagos!!! Can't believe I actually went there!!!


First view of the Galapagos


Crazy cactus trees!!!


Different variations in the sand at the Galapagos Islands


Sea Turtles!


They were huge!!!


Our first excursion...Floreana Island & Post Office Bay!


Our guide, Juan, showing us the "Post Office"


Ralf and Joan checking for mail!


Down into the unknown!!!


Exploring the underwater cave!


And we're off to the Devil's Crown!


Intense snorkeling happened here!


About to rest... ;)


A tranquil moment on the boat.


Second land excursion!


Sea Lions sleeping under the tree :)


So cute!


View on the other side of the island


Crabs were everywhere!



Looking out over the bay...


Next day of land excursions! (p.s. camera wasn't working quite right that day :/)




Baby sea lion!


View on the other side of the island


Blue-footed Boobies!!!


Hiking along the island...


Back on the boat for another land excursion...


Check this island out!!!


Sea Lion <3 ?!


Our boat, the MS Encantada (The Enchanted!)


More Blue-footed Boobies!!!


Sea Lions swimming right by us!


Sea Lion swimming right at us!!!


Spectacular scenery....


Baby Sea Lion!!!


These two are too cute!


Iguana!!! :P


Crazy cool cactus tree !


Sea gull


Sand-covered sea pup! Precious!!!


Seriously, sea lions were everywhere! Love it!!!


Matt and Emily out on the boat :)


Last Land Excursion


Frigates abound!


Last shot of the trip. So long Galapagos...soooooo fun!!! :)


Quito again = superbowl watch party with boatmates, Emily betting and losing, doing the macarena, photo with random people, and shots, equator adventure, water experiment, north=counter-clockwise, south=clockwise, equator=straight, balancing egg, finger pulling resistance, monument that was anti-climatic, backbends on the fake equator, holding up the world, art museum

Equator Experiment Park




Watching the water drain in different directions!


Emily trying to balance an egg!


Stretching out over both hemispheres!!!


ANNNNNDDDD, that's it! Hope you enjoyed the photos!!! xoxo, m