Time flies, no?!

Hello, hello! So it's been, what, 4 years since I've posted here? Holy h*ll. Errrrr, time flies, no?! So let's see...where to begin? Well...4 years ago I moved to Colombia and 3 years ago I met an amazing man. We're now married, I became a stepmom and we're about to embark on our own parenthood adventure, too. It's awesome, scary, fun and crazy all at the same time! What else? Let's see. In June, I walked away from my job and while it was definitely the right decision, it also hasn't been quite as easy as I thought it might be. A friend recently told me that it probably felt a lot like a breakup and although I hadn't thought of it like that, they were 100% right. Walking away and re-establishing myself has come with all those familiar emotions of a breakup and while annoying and hard, I know I'm better because of it. Just in the last week or so, I feel like a fog has been lifted (plus I'm finally not sick...hooray!) and while I'm not exactly jumping out of bed in the morning (let's be real, waking up at 5am for the last 4 years ssssssssucked...let me have my mornings for a lil' bit, k?), I don't exactly feel like sobbing for no reason and/or curling up in bed all day anymore. Now don't get me wrong, I still like a good cry and I definitely am enjoying my time and if that means being in bed all day, so be it! But...I don't have that hole anymore. You know that hole? Ugh, that hole blowssssssssss. Buttttttt, like all wounds/holes/scrapes/bruises, a little time, a little love and a whole lotta chocolate makes 'em fade before your eyes. It's kind of amazing how that all works and while my 19-year-old self NEVER would have believed that (ugh, that first heartbreak is the worst, no?), it's totally true. So anyway...here I am. 31, unemployed (self-employed?), trying for a baby and while not grieving anymore, I'm also not sure that I'm totally clear on where I want to go or be. I've been reading a lot and have some ideas on jobs/companies I want to do, but as I sit in our apartment in Bogota, I find it hard to get motivated to make them happen. People keep telling me to pursue these ideas and do all the grunt work here while I have the time, but it's hard to do all of that when I have no idea where to begin. Logo? Slogan? Business plan? Legal stuff? Bleh! I dunno. But I do know that writing/journaling helps me get things flowing so while I may not know where I'm going, I'm going and that's what's important to me.